Dark Doors

Ask. I will tell you a story.

Life collapses at 42

Douglas Adams has a lot to answer for.

I turned 42 just a few months ago, and within weeks, everything had changed.  Whether for the better remains to be seen.

I’m a teacher, or I was until less than two months ago.  New job at a new school was supposed to give me a new lease on teaching life.  Did it?  Nope.  Everything imploded – my health, my home life, my ability to teach, my ability to connect with teenagers, all of it was shot to nothing in the space of a few short (but felt like interminably long) weeks.  On Fridays, I should have been looking forward to the weekend; instead, I was dreading returning on Monday.  On Saturdays, I should have been relaxing and enjoying time with my family or going to karate; instead, I was planning lessons that would be completely destroyed within minutes of students entering the classroom.

I was a gibbering wreck of a human being.

My husband – Best. Husband. Ever! – gave me the space and support to make the choice that was best for me and for our family.  I chose to be signed off, and used that time and space to clear my head before making the next big decision.

I resigned.

And now I write.  Pretty much all day, fitting it around being a housewife (?!) and putting my lovely, but sorely neglected, house back into some semblance of order.  I signed up for NaNoWriMo, and I’m having the most fun I’ve had in years!  Nearly all my friends – bless ’em! – have offered to proofread my book.  Which is awesome, because I haven’t a clue whether it is any good or not.  I’m just hoping that they’ll decide to buy it too, if/when I get it finished/published.

I’m taking the next few months to find out if I can make writing a full-time, paying gig.

This blog will be a platform to present some of my writing to the world at large.  (I’ve not done anything like this before, so this is scaring me half-to-death when I think about it too much.)  I am hoping that you out there will read my writing and enjoy it; if you do, please comment, and don’t be afraid to include constructive criticism too.  If you don’t enjoy it, tell me what I’m doing wrong – but in that spirit of constructive criticism, not destructive.  Please.

So, jobless and trying to create a new career out of nothing but the words in my head and this blog, all at the age of 42.  But if I didn’t know that the answer to the Question of Life, the Universe and Everything was 42, I don’t think I would have had the strength to walk away.

Like I said, Douglas Adams has a lot to answer for.


  1. I think you are a wonderful teacher !! You got my daughter though her a level English when her collage teacher was not there to help and for that I will always be thankful xx you are my friend and although I annoy you xx I will always support you as and when I can cos u am your friend x I hope this is the support and message you want and need xxx hugs xx

  2. Two years behind you and sometimes I feel the same way. Just want to put everything else down and write…and sit…and write…and sit…

    Be well!

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